Favorite "Meditation of My Heart"

Call unto me,

and I will answer thee,

and shew thee great and mighty things,

which thou knowest not. --Jeremiah 33:3 KJV

Wednesday, February 20, 2013

40 & Cranky? Got Iron?

Well, last weekend was terrible, and it bothered me more than it typically would.  I've admittedly been unusually negative and cranky for about a week so when I went to the weight loss nurse yesterday Corrine was quick to point out to her that I was cranky.  (Sarcasm ahead) I love it when my kids help me out like this!  So after a complete checkup, we determined that I could use some more Iron.  This is the first that I have heard that low Iron can cause crankiness and come to find out, low Iron causes fussiness in children.  How did I not know this!  We struggle with the twins and Matt's Iron levels, but no one told me that this could contribute to fussiness.  Needless to say, I see red meat, deviled eggs, and greens in our dietary future!

I started today with a multivitamin with Iron.  Then I went to TOPS and found out that I had lost 3.75 pounds this week.  Needless to say that was an encouraging start to my day so I'm not sure if the Iron or the weight loss improved my mood.  BUT I think I know lots more people who may need some Iron!

Saturday, February 16, 2013

40: Day 40 is here!

Day 40 is not a great day.  Hubby is at debate AGAIN so its the kids and I.  Matt was packed and ready to go to Grandma's at 6am, but I was able to hold him off until early afternoon so Grandma could do her morning shopping and hair appointment.  The twins were especially busy getting into things, writing on walls, and leaving a trail behind them.  When I finally took Matt, Grace and David to Grandma's, I had the twins and Nate ride along and Corrine worked on putting the house back together.

This was one of those days that made me wonder why Ed has to work so far from home and for so many Saturdays in a row.  Why can't we find a home in Kansas or him find a job in Missouri? We haven't had us time except a few dinners in over 8 months.  I am truly emotionally exhausted right now.   Too many days of the kids seeing hubby for less than 2 hours a day.  Too much extra financial stress from the increasing gas prices costing $120 a week for his gas to/from work.  Not to mention my gas to appointment's and teaching.  Too much time with just me and the kids.  Too much work that I need to wrap up for the office, but always the constant interruptions and running to appointments.  The kids had 5 medical appointments this week and 7 doctor appointments next week.  Yes, day 40 is here and its one of the worst days that I've had in months!  I'm exhausted emotionally and I don't see a break in my future. 

Friday, February 15, 2013

40: Day 39 Not the Friday I Wanted

This Friday I had appointments in Jefferson City so I left at 5am with the twins and Nate.  Then I took them to Grandma's house along the way.  I finally picked them up and got home around 6pm.  I was greeted by Matt who was ready for his turn at Grandma's.  This was not exactly the first thing that I wanted to do after driving so much today.  I was hoping for dinner out with hubby and then some grocery shopping, but hubby had volunteered to work on a computer.  So I took Grace grocery shopping and convinced Matt to wait until tomorrow to go to Grandma's house.  In the end, the groceries weren't put away until after 11:30pm so it was just a long tiring day.

Thursday, February 14, 2013

40: Day 37 & 38

Wednesday and Thursday were a little less hectic because there was no flight school on Valentine's Day.  I still had to go to Branson on Wednesday, and this week Corrine and I also visited the dentist.

I made a huge dinner on Valentine's with a little bit of everything for each kid's favorites and hubby's favorite steak.  I also tried a new grilled onions recipe.  It was a big hit so we'll be making that steak topping again.

Day 40 is almost here and on Day 42 I visit the doctor again for a check up so I'll get the official doctor weigh in.  I had expected to complete more projects in these 40 days, but I'm pleased with what I did get done.

Tuesday, February 12, 2013

Day 36: Weigh-in

Well, weigh in today was disappointing for me. I lost only 2 1/2 pounds.  So as you can guess, I'm taking this week super serious.  I need a bigger loss next week!

Not much news today, other than taking the kids to Springfield for their orthotics appointment.  We were disappointed there too because we learned that our favorite orthotist is retiring in August.  Change is tough.

BTW-If you did not see this on Facebook, please share it with others who you think may know the person that we are seeking for Jon.

JOB OPENING:  As of around April 1st we will be needing a new aid for Jon. Amber insists on getting married and Jon is going to miss her terribly so we need a replacement as awesome as Amber. 36-40 hours per week. Pay is through an agency so its not a cash job. The Jon smiles are better than the pay!

Monday, February 11, 2013

Day 35: Another Weigh In Day Eve

Yes, tomorrow is weigh in day and as usual I'm starting to worry about a number on a scale, that so many reminded me last week, really shouldn't matter.  However, for me, the number is important because it is my proof to myself that this is working so as usual I'm wondering if I should have done more exercise or ate more lean meats...I'm kind of tired of fish and chicken.

Tonight I made two 3 pound Mediterranean pork tenderloin and served them on a bed of seasoned mustard greens and drizzled with balsamic reduction.  Then I served whole grain brown rice as side.  It was all so tasty, but if the scales are not kind tomorrow, then I'm thinking that I should have had baked fish again.

Nate fell asleep with the remote in his hand last night.  I had to laugh at his grip on it even while he was sleeping.

Sunday, February 10, 2013

40: Weekend Days 32, 33 & 34

This weekend was all that I had expected.  I spent all of Friday trying to get my calendar organized and double checking that all the routine check-ups had been set up.  Friday night was a quiet evening, and it was an early bedtime since Ed had to leave at 4:15am to go to the tournament.

Saturday without Daddy was hectic.  The twins and Nate were ready for Daddy time, and he was at the tournament for work.  Grace and Corrine did their best to try to offer Daddy type activities to wear them out.  It helped that David and Matt went to visit Grandma and Grand-dad so it was just the 3 four year olds trying to overthrow the balance of power.  Our newest struggle with one of my little guys is about underwear.  He wants to go commando, and I say no!  I had to set a new rule that "Underwear is required at the table."  Then at dinner his brother came and pulled down his pants to show me that he had his underwear on...so obviously my new rule has some disadvantages. LOL!

Sunday I was exhausted so Ed let  me sleep in.  For dinner, I made two 4+ pound London Broil with roasted herb potatoes and carrots.  Much to my surprise, our kids loved it.  There was no leftovers to put away, which means that some kids ate a pound or more of beef! 

I've stuck to my diet and even made a balsamic reduction in preparation for next weeks meals.  I'm trying to prepare more and more of "my" kind of foods for the kids.  Some of it has been well received and some hasn't.   So far Hannah has liked more of the "healthified" foods than anyone else, and I appreciate her willingness to try these foods!

Thursday, February 7, 2013

40: Busy Days 30 and 31

Wednesdays and Thursdays are typically so busy and tiring that they seem like one long day with a nap.  My Wednesday night class ends in early March so only a few more weeks of this Super Woman pace.  I love teaching and I'm glad I can take Grace to her flight lessons, but the two back-to-back really wear me down. 

Starting some exercise finally, after all I'm in the last 10 days of my 40 day trial so I need to get moving on doing all that I  had planned.  I'm starting simple with just standing on my on leg a few minutes each hour or so and doing some stretches each day.  I figure its a good start to building back up stamina for using my crutches for longer distances, plus the standing is a nice stretch break during hours of paperwork.

BTW-Tried Culvers healthy menu items roast beef sandwich and side salad in Branson.  I really am not much of a meat eater, but I thought the pot roast was tough, dry and flavorless.  I think they need to borrow my crock pot!  So needless to say, Culvers did not make me a repeat customer.

Tuesday, February 5, 2013

40: Day 29 Weigh In

Oh the big weigh in day has come.   I lost 3 3/4 pound again which is encouraging.  It brings my weight loss total to 21 1/2 pounds in 29 days.  Today's loss certainly counts as encouragement from the scales!  However, then my day was filled with errands, making dinner and trying to finish preparing for class tomorrow night.  I am exhausted and rather grumpy so I think an early bedtime is my priority tonight.  Vanessa is rather grumpy too and I think both of us over did it today while enjoying the great weather and sunshine.

Monday, February 4, 2013

Weigh in's Eve: Day 28

After 28 days of healthy eating, you would think that healthy eating and feeling well could be a reward in and of itself, BUT its NOT! 

I need the scales to reward me with a weekly loss to keep me motivated.  So on this weigh in's eve, I can't think of anything I would change except the sushi that I ate with the mystery nutritional value.  Therefore, as I close out this day, I'm praying for a big loss this week!

Sunday, February 3, 2013

A Weekend in My Forties: Day 26 & 27

This weekend is the last weekend that hubby is home for the next month and a half.  Its time to take his students to tournaments again.  However, he had to go take care of exchange student details on Saturday so I guess my saturdays alone with the kids actually started 2 weekends ago.  I hate it that we live so far from his job and his tounament days start and end 2 hours before/after everyone elses. I am thankful that he has a job he loves, but this is the time of year that it starts getting tough.  The boys really need the discipline that he can demand simply with the tone of his voice and I really need alone time with him too. 

It seems like there is always kids needing rides, going to activities and needing us that we seem to forget that we need time for each other.  Plus there are routine distractions of life such as TV, computer, telephone, etc that can reduce time together even further.  Grace has graciously given Ed and I time to go out for a late dinner each of the last few Fridays.  It has been nice, but it also has highlighted how we need to plan a weekend away again.  However, that must wait as usual.

Grace and I did get some time together Saturday evening which was very nice.  Grace loves sushi so after shopping, we ate sushi.  It was interesting on a diet because I'm not sure of the dietary exchanges for some of the "stuff" we ate because I'm not sure what all of it was.  Anyone have a dietary guide to sushi?  I'm hoping that it won't effect my weight loss!

Sunday was a day of distractions and unexpected chores.  I really hate days like that, but it is especially cruel when its a Sunday.  I'm feeling robbed of my recharge day.  Next weekend will be better!

Friday, February 1, 2013

Forty's First February

2 weeks before turning 20 years old;
Helping at the Women's Shelter
I was thinking the other day of how life slowly changes by decade.  Each decade has had its own focus.  Its own definitions of the most meaningful things in life.  It really made me reflect on where I've been as I was trying to predict what forty will bring based on my 25 days of experience.

My twenties were all about me....getting to know myself through new adventures, reaching for my dreams, and trying to evaluate and decide things based on my twenty some years of experience being sheltered. I started my twenties focused on missions but that door wasn't opening.  My disability scared foreign mission groups and for the first time my disability really scared me.  I looked around the university at lots of folks with disabilities with degrees and coming back for more degrees and more classes because they couldn't find employers to give them a chance.  Then a small volunteer job at a rescue mission in Springfield turned into a bigger volunteer job and ultimately into a real job.  I was relieved.  Not only was I doing the mission work that I had felt called to,but I was getting job experience.  

The mission was an experience that couldn't be replicated.  I learned so much about the complexities of life issues and the simplicity of trusting Jesus to fix the complex.  I had asked Christ to be Lord of my life and to let me serve His purposes as a very young child, but the mission is where I found the power that God has to transform lives, if we ask Him to help us.  Unfortunately, I cannot say that I realized my own need to rely of His power yet because like most twenty somethings I had lots of energy, ideas, ideals and plans. (Yep, I was "that" annoying.)

Our family right after Hannah home. I probably
should have worked on her smiling for the camera
before we got this taken.
My thirties were all about doing things for my kids.  I made decisions based on what I thought would give them "the best".  I had Grace and then Corrine in my twenties, and I was completely comfortable with going to work while they were being cared for by my mom or Ms. Pat.  However, as thirty approached the late nights and overnight trips started conflicting with the girls' needs for my time.  At this same time, we had been approved to adopt Hannah, but we had to wait for me to turn thirty to get our travel date.  I remember getting up on my thirtieth birthday and telling Ed, "I feel like such a better parent" as a joke about Ecuador requiring me to be thirty to complete the adoption.  I could never have predicted that nine months later I would open my own business and radically change our lives to better meet Hannah's needs and our family's needs. 

The rest of my thirties are rather obvious in our family picture.  We went from 2 daughters to 4 daughters and 6 sons!  Not bad for one decade! However, all joking aside.  The Lord let me be a part of the most miraculous kids lives.  Each one building my understanding of and reliance on God's power.  I can remember praying for so many of the kids to learn to trust us as their new parents.  I can remember praying at night for Nate to take another breath when he was so sick an there was often long pauses between his noisy deep gasping breaths. So many prayers and so many amazing answers.

My favorite crew in my favorite vehicle.
So having looked back and having been forty for 25 days, I'm wondering what will be my focus of this decade.  I can honestly say that it is highly unlikely that I could guess.  Considering, I have 10 kids; my favorite car is a bus; my personal space is a TV tray; and I carry my office in a laundry basket; I'm sure the new decade will be uniquely perfect for me.  Yes, I am starting to look forward to what this new decade holds, even if its labeled "forty".